My Thai Times: Venturing out of the city...

Our little hut.

This weekend was the unofficial staff bonding trip. I had planned on attending, but then I reconsidered. Even though Koh Samet used to be a really cheap place to travel, it isn’t as cheap anymore. The island is beautiful, but I didn’t feel like lounging in the tropics (without a boy to really enjoy it with—beach, sand, and sun do strange things to me) so I opted to go to Kanchanaburi with Mike, Sunny, and Daylin (her nine year old son). I miss my nieces and nephews and was looking forward to being silly with a kid for a weekend. Sunny and Daylin are from Canada and Mike is from California. The last two years they all lived in Taiwan and two years before that they were in Guatemala. Listening to them talk about where they have lived before was entertaining.

Thursday after school we hopped on a bus to Kanchanaburi, which is about two hours north east of Bangkok, cozily nestled on the River Kwai. A relatively small town, Kanchanaburi is very different from the hustle and bustle of Bangkok. Much quieter and very relaxing. We found a little guest house on the river and crashed. After a good night’s rest, Daylin was the first to wake up and on his way out the door to explore his surroundings, he spied a lizard in the room. Of course this roused the adults out of bed and caused a rearrange-the-room search for the little rascal. We looked all over the place but could not find it. (Mike eventually found him in his pants pocket Sunday after he had returned home! It was still alive, biding its time eating pocket lint.)

At breakfast, we were deciding what to do and we met B, one of the ubiquitous tour guides in Thailand. I had heard about the tour guides but this was my first experience with a real, live one. They are kind of like a blood tick; once they latch on to you, they are difficult to remove. She was actually very nice, but her persistence went beyond irritating. The first time you hear, “Special price, just for you,” it sounds pretty sweet, but the tenth time you hear it, you want to scream. Especially when she was trying to sell us something we didn’t want. We arranged a long-tailed boat ride on the River Kwai. B took us to the boat in what I would call a Thai golf cart; a motorcycle with a side cart that had a floor, a roof, and an L shaped bench attached to it. It was kind of rickety; she told me where to sit to ensure even weight distribution.

The boat ride was a mellow trip along the river. We saw the famous Bridge over the River Kwai (you may have seen or heard about the movie http://imdb.com/title/tt0050212/) and passed several floating party boats. At nine-thirty in the morning, the passengers on the party boats (more or less pontoons the size of a dance hall) were rocking and rolling with dance music and beers in hand.

We went to the Koapoon Cave Temple by boat. This was an interesting concept. A cave, complete with stalagmites and stalactites and a golden reclining Buddha. I don’t know how they fit the Buddha into the cave because there were times when squeezing through the tiny apertures throughout the cave were quite an ordeal. Duck, squeeze, squat down, crawl…it was a workout. Our Thai tour guide, who was about fifteen years old, seemed to put his hands on me every chance he had. He was the most tactile Thai I have met since I’ve been here. At one point, he was trying to situate me on a ledge next to an alligator rock formation and he tried to lift me up under the arms and scoot me to where he thought I should be for a photo op. I laughed at his feeble attempt. Sunny thought it was pretty funny, too. Being in a country where the absence of human touch is the norm, it was especially awkward to be manhandled by an adolescent.

After our trek through the cave, we headed back to our guest house for a little nap. Later in the afternoon, B picked us up again in her little Thai golf cart and took us to a songtow (a truck with benches along the bed and a roof—not an enclosed cab, just a roof). I do believe this kind of travel is illegal in Virginia. But so is riding a motorcycle without a helmet. Anyway, the tiger temple was only about twenty minutes away. This is actually a forest monastery. The monks take in orphaned tigers and other animals that are in need of nurturing. There are about eleven tigers in the canyon, a large rock formation that encircles the tigers that are just hanging out, chained to posts but not in cages. Huge tigers. Many more attendants were present than there were tigers, which I guess was supposed to make us feel safe. As I was waiting my turn, I watched each person being fed…I mean led to the tigers. Only once did I hear a tiger roar, immediately after which Mike was led to that very tiger to pose for a picture with him; I think he was a wee bit frightened. As I was being led by the hand to the tigers, I found myself thinking that at any moment one of these seemingly tame cats could decide to maul me. Jump right up and tear me to pieces. I tentatively knelt next to a big kitty for a picture; do I need to say that I was scared to death? Despite this fear, I dared to put my hand out and laid it on the feline’s rump, but only briefly. I caught a glimpse of one the cat’s rather large teeth…the better to eat me with. My heart beat ratcheted up a notch or ten while I was in such close proximity with these beautiful but monstrous creatures. Daylin even posed for a picture sitting on top of a tiger. His mom couldn’t watch for fear.

After everyone had his or her pictures taken with the tigers in the canyon, all but one of the potentially ferocious beasts were led out by the attendants. The last one was led by the monk. We then had the option of walking with the tiger. This was a rather imposing task as the tiger was no longer chained, just walking calmly beside you like a golden retriever or some other ambling domestic animal. We were given three rules to follow: no loud noises, lay one hand on the tiger’s rump so it knows you are there, and ladies, do not touch the monk. This struck me as slightly comical—touch the tiger but don’t lay a finger on the monk.

I thought this was the end of our adventure at the tiger temple but I was mistaken. After the tigers were put into cages a fair distance away from the canyon, some men came along with large rucksacks of corn on the cob. They threw the bags down on the ground so hard that they split open and then the men whistled. All of a sudden animals were running from every direction. A virtual stampede, pigs, horses, cows, roosters, peacocks, water buffalo, goats, and deer all made their way to the corn. While they were feasting, we walked casually through the animals as if they were merely people milling about a train station. I’ve visited farms before and been to parks with animals, but this was a totally different experience. Perhaps the lack of fences made it unique to me. All I could think about was how I wish Daniel, Hannah, Lizam, and Abby (especially Abby with her penchant for animals) could be there with me to see it.

Later in the evening, after a delicious Thai dinner complete with wine, we all had hour long massages, even little Daylin. I had a neck and back massage while everyone else opted for foot massages. This was the best massage I have had so far in Thailand. Not painful and not intrusive. Just out and out wonderful. Afterwards, we were all served a cup of tea. And then I went to bed and slept soundly.

Saturday morning we headed out to the floating market. We were under the impression that the floating market was nearby. So when we climbed into the back of the songtow, we were not expecting a ninety minute ride in the bed of a truck. My hair was a mess at the end of it all and felt like hay right out of a pig sty, gritty and gross. We had paid B for the outing before we left which was 490 baht per person. When we arrived at the klong to get on the boat, we were asked for another 500 baht per person. We were not in the best of moods, as we had just spent an hour and a half riding in the bed of a pickup truck, and we felt scammed. Big time. B could tell we were upset and somehow the price of the boat ride was miraculously slashed to 250 baht per person, but we still felt like we had been had. The brochure said that the price of the trip included the boat ride and B had made it all “special price.” Yeah, a real special price. But since we had traveled all that way, and we had a nine year old with us who had been pretty patient during the ride up, we went ahead with the boat ride anyway. Riding in the boat was the best part—it reminded me of Venice; Angelo steering us through the canals on the gondola. That was where the similarity ended though. The shopping was actually pretty useless and touristy. I have seen much nicer crafts and better quality items at the street markets.

We headed back to Kanchanaburi, but only after being taken to a couple different places. We really just wanted to head back, but B tried to tempt us to spend more money on a visit to an elephant show and a woodworking shop. It was easier to just submit and do as she said. We did not pay the entrance fee into the elephant place, but there was an elephant by the parking lot that Daylin was able to play with. The elephant did all sorts of tricks and even gave Daylin a massage. If given the chance, would you lay down for an elephant to massage your back with its immense trunk?

After another ninety minute ride in the truck, I was ready for a treat. Back in Kanchanaburi, I treated myself to a facial. I lay on the table and had all sorts of lotions, soaps, exfoliants, and powder lavished all over my face. Afterwards, my face felt baby smooth and I was refreshed.

We returned to Bangkok and had dinner at Senor Picos. Muy deliciouso. I enjoyed some sangria and enchiladas. For all I knew, I could have been at La Tolteca in Williamsburg. There was also a Cuban band playing which helped create a festive atmosphere. This was a fabulous ending to a wonderful weekend excursion.